Jonathan Hitchcock (@vhata)

Cape Town, South Africa

The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @vhata ever

August 2009

Under no circumstances let iTunes start playing "James Brown - I Feel Good" just before you plan to go to bed. It won't happen.

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Harper-Collins's email exhorts me to "flood twitter and social media and create online buzz" about Twitter Wit. That's not how we roll, HC.

via TweetDeck

Oh, yeah, that's why I stopped reading twitter. (Hint: it's you.)

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Le Petit Prince never had to deal with glare on a laptop screen. He might not have been so smug then.

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You can tell it's Monday because the sunrise is just something that makes you unable to see your screen to carry on dealing with a crisis.

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I joined another 95 cars trying to be clever and miss the N2 traffic, and we formed a little echidna lovetrain crawling through back streets

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The Internet: rewarding selfishness, sociopathy and exploitation of your peers since the terms "SEO" and "Social Media" were coined.

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Since I moved my technical mailing lists to gmail, the sponsored ads on the side have drifted from "Lose fat fast!" to "Free DivX codecs!"

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HE"S STILL THERE.

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He's just sitting on the balcony now. Watching me. Waiting. Do you think he knows my surname is Hitchcock? Has he seen "The Birds"?

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Final score: Jonathan - 1; Pigeon - 0; Jonathan's floor - covered in guano. Damn pigeons.

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Aha! Solution: pigeons apparently can't see in the dark.

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WHERE THE HELL HAS IT GONE?!

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I am still on step 1, of course.

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Step 1: tweet about the bird trapped in your flat. Step 2: attempt to remove the bird from your flat.

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Neither man nor pigeon has been adequately prepared by evolution for dealing with the latter being trapped in the former's living room.

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Tonight's achievement: verifying the claim that peanut butter will remove chewing gum from hair. Next: finishing the rest of the wine.

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Ever notice how, if you say it often enough, the word "deploy" just starts sounding ridiculous?

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310 days, 10 hours, 53 minutes left till the first injury from World Cup Soccer hooliganism in South Africa!

via TweetDeck