I still have stuff that Past Jonathan didn't do because he said Future Jonathan would. Feels like it's only me who does any work round here.
Myself and three other trained engineers; eight minutes of button pushing and swearing; Final result: fax successfully sent!
I want to meet a sushi chef who looks clearly 100% Japanese, but has a broad Scottish accent. "Och aye, wee spot o' sashimi fir ya, laddie?"
Okay, I'll bump "hang curtains" up the list a few places. Also, to my new neighbour: I'm *really* sorry.
Ug. Packing. Can't I just throw all my crockery out the window, and buy more when I move into the new place?
Calm down, mum. I was only in the cop car because we had to go identify my car, which was found in North Phillipi. Sheesh.
This tweet comes to you from the back of a cop car. Unsure whether to be comforted by the fact that the police are worse drivers than I am.