Jonathan Hitchcock (@vhata)

Cape Town, South Africa

The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @vhata ever

September 2010

@oxo42 (a) learn to spell 'fascist'. (b) you live in a house made of glass Windows, stone-thrower.

via Twitterrific for Mac in reply to oxo42

Man, it must have been so awesome to be a musician in the late 90s and realise that "hole" rhymed with "soul".

via Twitterrific for Mac

Breaking news: workplace relationships descend to new levels of awkwardness as help is requested "if you have a sex"

via Twitterrific for Mac

Google: connecting you to people with the same unresolved issues as yourself since 1996.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Yes, that's it! That's the exact error I'm getting, Google! I see you found tons of people with that error! No actual *solutions*, though?

via Twitterrific for Mac

Haha you guys, I dreamed that I actually tweeted publicly about a really embarrassing nerdy dream that I had. Man, my wacky subconscious.

via Twitterrific for Mac

I actually dreamed that I had #NewTwitter. This was an honest-to-goodness part of my dream last night. Jeez.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Three types of cake at work for September birthdays. I think I just lost vision in my right eye.

via Twitterrific for Mac

My findings: Cape Town pays its hardest workers less than it spends on coffee. Liberté, égalité, fraternité.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Yeah, I'm gathering that These Days we're saying "domestic worker" (or "domestic goddess" in some cases). Sorry 'bout that...

via Twitterrific for Mac

Hey, Cape Town - what do we pay a maid per day to clean the house?

via Twitterrific for Mac

I'm embarrassed by my second- and third-degree re-tweeters.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Worth it just for the links at the bottom: http://is.gd/fwltW

via Twitterrific for Mac

(Although Arrested Development has made me unable to talk about the author without raising both fists in the air. STEVE TOLTZ.)

via Twitterrific for Mac

I have a renewed love for the book "A Fraction of the Whole" (by Steve Toltz) as of its use of the pluralization "culs-de-sac".

via Twitterrific for Mac

Good Advice For The Web: never trust a checkbox that says "Don't post my results to twitter". Grr.

via web

Right foot 2 stomps, left foot 2 stomps! Slide to the left, slide to the right! Criscross criscross, cha cha real smooth! http://is.gd/fvBpu

via Twitterrific for Mac

Two separate waitrons have patted me sympathetically on the shoulder, in unrelated conversations. WHAT?

via TweetDeck

Btw, turns out: you can't play Pooh-sticks with stones. I want my afternoon back.

via TweetDeck

@allankent my tweet apparently made people laugh. Your tweet did nothing but tell me that my tweet was useless. Um. Thanks?

via web in reply to allankent

I just watched a video of four midgets in a relay race against a camel. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, HUMANITY?

via web

@Favstar: RT-checking still seems a bit iffy, looking at http://favstar.fm/users/... and its equiv on twitter.com...

via Twitterrific for Mac

@ingridsinclair And because you just said 'tweeps', you move into the "oh well, that's one less of them" category...

via web in reply to ingridsinclair

@xenijardin: and you know that the Ambassador Of Zef is the same suburban middle class white boy who sang this? http://is.gd/foHXS

via web in reply to xenijardin

Does @xenijardin realise that every time she posts about Die Antwoord, she's getting punk'd in Afrikaans? http://is.gd/foFgG

via Twitterrific for Mac

The Cape Town municipality should rename the Noon Gun. I'm thinking something like "the Noon Pant-Wettingly Terrifyingly Loud Explosion".

via Twitterrific for Mac

Your *mother* has had her total request limit exceeded. OH NO WAIT SHE HASN'T.

via Twitterrific for Mac

I'm guessing the pause in between loops of your on-hold music is while you rewind the tape?

via Twitterrific for Mac

Nothing soothes me like the gentle mandolin in your on-hold music, interspersed with your assurances of my importance.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Oh, THAT wet cement.

via TweetDeck

8,024 more tweets since you started searching. Not quite as viral as that video with that guy doing that thing, but noble effort!

via Twitterrific for Mac

The moral of the story, folks, is that you can't play with the sourcecode of a virus without getting infected repeatedly. Stupid mouseover.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Happy graph: http://is.gd/fl6Rl :)

Really sad graph (press play): http://bit.ly/8XKThM :(

via Twitterrific for Mac

Wait you guys there's more! A SourceForge.net newsletter! Man, so cute! Is it retro-site Tuesday? Or did I wake up in 2002?

via Twitterrific for Mac

Orkut friend suggestions. That's adorable. Like when they deliver the phone book.

via Twitterrific for Mac

WombatSam Lots of Hipster hate out there today. I can even hear it over the synth from my friend's electro-folk band playing on my iPad.

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 5:50 PM, Sep 20th, 2010 via web)

okgo Here it is, the brand spankin' new video for 'White Knuckles'. Enjoy! http://bit.ly/wkellen

via HootSuite (retweeted on 5:50 PM, Sep 20th, 2010 via web)

Just did the equivalent of yelling "FREEBIRD" at my iTunes...

via Twitterrific for Mac

One of these is not like the others. http://twitpic.com/2qbpkv

via Twitpic

This week began with me pouring my coffee into my juice cup. I need more datapoints to calculate its trajectory, though.

via Twitterrific for Mac

@darb are you referring to Tax, where we all give a little bit back to society, so that the money can be used to improve life for everyone?

via Twitterrific for Mac in reply to darb

And, of course, Mike and the Mechanics. Of course.

via TweetDeck

It feels like someone follows me from cafe to deli to restaurant, slipping a Best Of The 80s CD to the managers. Now playing: Foreigner.

via TweetDeck

Picked a blue one.

via TweetDeck

Paralysed, frozen with the impossibility of trying to choose one of seven identical vacuum cleaner brands. This is not my field.

via TweetDeck

Fact: the only routine in my entire life is the juice and double latte I have when I arrive at work at 11am. http://is.gd/feLi0

via Twitterrific for Mac

No, YOU re-enter your password.

via Twitterrific for Mac

@graulund: TweetNest is great. I'd love to see replies included, and 'favorites' include other people's tweets that I starred, not just mine

via Twitterrific for Mac

Guys, I totally just sent a thing via the Fax! What do I get? Promotion? Or forced retirement?

via Twitterrific for Mac

"Ten" is definitely the best album. And "Pearl Jam" is definitely the best way to show one's age.

via Twitterrific for Mac

This #AfrihostRelaunch should be amusing, since their DNS is round-robin'ing to localhost (and http://bit.ly/d8Yeeq to make this official)

via Twitterrific for Mac

The worst part about being followed by co-workers on Twitter is that they see you tweet about them and ask you who you were talking about.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Help make the farce less farcical! http://bit.ly/a3LEWR

via Twitterrific for Mac

Having difficulty typing this tweet because the glorious Cape Town sunshine is causing screen-glare. A good problem to have, indeed.

via web

@joeschmitt tweets "who would like to collaborate with me on @BearsPR?", starts it, retweets his own stuff a while, then pimps it? Unfollow.

via Twitterrific for Mac

One line from IMDB.com made my night: aka "O megalos Lebowski" - Greece

via Twitterrific for Mac

My meal choices at Indian restaurants are always based on the cute way they're described. "ROGAN JHOSH an energetic curry the name depicts".

via TweetDeck

This clown @danielrayong is going to make a lot of people very happy in 2 days.

via Twitterrific for Mac

You look like the sort of person who likes using the hair-dryer while taking a bath.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Current status: Richard III, Act 1, Scene 1, line 1

via Twitterrific for Mac

Now reading: critiques of the Klingon interchange between two main characters in Chuck, season 1, episode 10. Stay nerdy, Internet.

via web

@dotb: If you install the .mpkg or .pkg or use the .dmg, you can use OS X's built-in package management: `pkgutil --help`

via Twitterrific for Mac in reply to dotb

@dotb: we don't do that. We absolutely do not. Compiling from source is not something we do. That's why. (You're doing it wrong.)

via Twitterrific for Mac in reply to dotb

Found myself automatically washing the dishes in descending order of size. I have a really bad case of CDO.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Sometimes, when I run out of 30Rock episodes, I like to sit on my leg till it goes numb and then see if I can walk right across the room!

via Twitterrific for Mac

@ripienaar: let a guy give his punchline before you nail him on his set up!

via web in reply to ripienaar

(It's fun to tweet about yourself from the point of view of the people who live next door to you.)

via Twitterrific for Mac

Hah, sounds like my loser neighbour is spending his evening by himself, watching 30 Rock and eating a microwave dinner, again.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Twitter confused me with its "no white after Labor Day" tweets, so I looked it up, and finally got a definitive answer: Americans are crazy.

via Twitterrific for Mac

@1rene: I'm sorry, have we met? And you are...? (Sentence is finished: "one of the only people to comment sensibly on http://is.gd/eY1YZ")

via Twitterrific for Mac in reply to 1rene

When you say "twitter buzz on this article", you mean "list of people retweeting the URL of this article with vacuous concurrence", right?

via Twitterrific for Mac

@matthewbuckland: "Facebook [...] where quality is policed". You've... you've looked at Facebook, right?

via web in reply to matthewbuckland

Seriuslllly,to hel wiiiiiiiit his wirless kyboard

via Twitterrific for Mac

Warning signs: your Product Manager shouts "DO IT LIVE!" and then starts singing a hybrid of Aerosmith and Bon Jovi.

via Twitterrific for Mac

I think @TheMime's material has gone really down-hill since he sold out.

via Twitterrific for Mac

It's so cute watching developers playing at "Product and User Experience". Teeeell me what oo want to be when you gwow up! *pinch cheek*

via Twitterrific for Mac

You say "useless bachelor", I say "guy who *likes* showering in the dark, and would buy new lightbulbs if he didn't". So there. Shut up.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Don't judge me, gym desk attendant. If I was only in there for twenty minutes, it's because I have a very important ... pub ... to get to...

via Twitterrific for Mac

Well gawrsh, and a Happy Birthday to @yodelmachine! You don't look a day over the age you didn't look a day over last year.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Guys, the chicken ones aren't that great, okay? Just FYI. For next time. Cool.

via Twitterrific for Mac

I can cook a sixth of a pack of two-minute-noodles in 20 seconds flat.

via Twitterrific for Mac

I've finally managed to train my Priority Inbox to mark my Daily Dilbert Comic as Important, and flag everything else as junk.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Hey look! The guy that wrote most of the songs that Queen covered is on twitter! #followfriday @kleptones

via Twitterrific for Mac

Gmail ads next to a party invitation email: China Haemorrhoid Stapler, Bathroom Hygiene, Japanese Toilet Seat. Gonna be a hell of a party.

via Twitterrific for Mac

@StephanieBamBam: Year-month-day, or day-month-year, all good. Month-day-year, whut?

via Twitterrific for Mac in reply to StephanieBamBam

@StephanieBamBam: I know about Beverly Hills 90210 (or "Ninety Two Ten" as they called it in Zimbabwe). But today is 2010-09-02, or 2/9/10.

via Twitterrific for Mac in reply to StephanieBamBam

Ohhh, I just worked it out. You Americans are talking about 90210 today because you write your dates in a stupid nonsensical order. Gotcha.

via Twitterrific for Mac

The South African workers unions are kind of taking "strike while the iron's hot" the wrong way.

via Twitterrific for Mac

"This version of iTunes (9.2.1) is the current version." That's not what Steeeeeve saaaiiiid...

via Twitterrific for Mac

@IvoVegter: that's Tweetdeck's fault. Twitter doesn't know what app you use, or if/when it's updated. Stop whining.

via Twitterrific for Mac in reply to IvoVegter

@IvoVegter: and what would you have done differently if you'd had the email a week ago? Tweet angrily about it?

via Twitterrific for Mac in reply to IvoVegter

@avesse: why should ordinary users care about something that only developers and app-writers need to deal with (and were warned about)?

via Twitterrific for Mac in reply to avesse

@avesse, @IvoVegter: @twitter gave everybody plenty of warning: http://is.gd/eRgHR - your failure to read is not their failure to notify.

via Twitterrific for Mac in reply to avesse

I just tried to wipe what turned out to be a site's background image off my monitor. Possibly time for some more coffee.

via Twitterrific for Mac

I got spam to the address I created in order to sign up to the Direct Marketing Association of South Africa in order to opt-out of spam.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Sod off, trendy, happy, chatty smokers outside the restaurant. I'm trying to sulk out here with my wine in peace.

via TweetDeck

The thing about gin is, good gin is good, but bad gin is BAD. That's the thing about gin.

via Twitterrific for Mac

I wonder if I can get @twitterific to auto-reply to me with that message? They look like they're having fun, poor dears.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Oh yeah? Well, MY startup will have toilet-paper dispensing iPads in every stall.

via Twitterrific for Mac

That's it. I'm revoking my own English license. One cannot pluralize "nemesis" and get away with it.

via Twitterrific for Mac

Google's priorities for my inbox are substantially different to my own.

via Twitterrific for Mac